NFL Week 11 Picks

Hey gang,

It's been a good week, but a busy one. I'm definitely through the worst of the semester now, and the rest is basically a formality. I am almost ready to declare victory. That being said, I am still rather busy, and I made things worse by going out a couple of times this weekend, so it will be another round of quick picks this week. Enjoy.

Jersey Jets at New England: Once again, I forgot to pick the Thursday game. But if I had remembered, it wouldn't have mattered, because I would have been wrong. Fuck the Garden State Jets. Fuck them in their stupid asses. Now that the Patriots no longer seem like the evil empire (hell, if not for Belichick and Vince Wilfork, this Pats team would be almost likable), the Jets have taken over their place as my most hated division rival. But it's finally time for me to admit that they might actually be good.

Denver at Atlanta: FALCONS. Take a good look at Jay Cutler and Matt Ryan in this game. That's the future of the NFL you're looking at.

Philadelphia at Cincinnati: EAGLES. I can see Philly getting back into this thing.

Chicago at Green Bay: BEARS. I've given the Packers the benefit of the doubt so many times this season, and they keep letting me down. No more. Beware of Bears.

Houston at Indianapolis: COLTS. I can see Indy getting back into this thing.

New Orleans at Kansas City: SAINTS. I cannot see the Saints getting back into this thing, but they will beat the Chiefs.

Oakland at Miami: DOLPHINS. Every other team in the AFC East is getting better while the Bills are free-falling. I hate everything.

Baltimore at Jersey Giants: GIANTS. Yes, I was wrong about the Bears beating Tennessee last week. Yes, the Titans are still undefeated. But at this point I'm finding it difficult to imagine a scenario in which the Giants do not repeat as Super Bowl champs. They're that good. They can do it all. They do not have a weakness. And they will go back-to-back.

Minnesota at Tampa Bay: BUCS. In a battle of violent, seafaring peoples, I'm taking the home team.

Detroit at Carolina: PANTHERS. I stand by what I said about the Giants. But the Panthers are dangerous. If they can win a game when Jake "The Gnome" Delhomme plays as badly as he did last week against the Raiders, people should be very, very frightened of what this team can do when Jake has a good game.

Tennessee at Jacksonville: TITANS. I was somewhat tempted to pick against Tennessee again this week. A road game against a division rival, and a division rival who as expected to be very good at the beginning of the season. But the Jags have been a huge disappointment, they're just not together, and I can't see them overcoming Tennessee's defense.

St. Louis at San Francisco: 49ERS. Wow. I found myself wishing for a third option when I made this pick.

Arizona at Seattle: CARDINALS. The Seahawks actually showed a little friskiness when they nearly beat Miami on the road last week, but the Cards just have too much firepower. Even traveling to the Pacific Northwest, 'Zona should go back to the desert with a record of 7-3. I can't believe it either.

San Diego at Pittsburgh: STEELERS. As bad as the AFC West is, I can see the Chargers getting back into this thing. But they're almost out of chances. Yes, their division is a war of attrition, but if they fall to 4-6 today, and they probably will, it will become a lot harder to see them reaching the postseason.

Dallas at Washington: COWBOYS. Romo is back. So are the Cowboys. And Portis might not play. I think Dallas will serve notice to the league on national television tonight-- Jerry Jones isn't crazy. The Cowboys WILL get back into this thing.

Cleveland at Buffalo: THE BILLS. Call it a homer pick if you want to. The Browns are a trendy pick this week for a road team to steal a victory. And the Bills are patently awful, I'll admit it. But the Browns aren't a hell of a lot better. And I think all the people who are picking Cleveland in this game are underestimating the influence of a crazy, drunken Buffalo crowd on Monday night. Remember last year's Monday night game, when our fans nearly carried us to a victory over the vastly superior Cowboys? Yeah, we might get a similar kind of boost this week. I've got a good feeling about this. I think we break out of our slump and roll over the Browns.

All right, that's all for this week. Enjoy.

-Niztradamus

PS-- I know it's annoying to try to force one's musical taste on other people, but bear with me for a minute. The new Butch Walker record came out last week, and I'm not going to write a whole thing talking about how great it is (although I could). I'll just say this-- do me a favor and listen to one song. Download the song "Vessels" from the new album. I'm listening to it right now, and it's making me happy (even though it's a sad song, and even though I'm a pretty morose person). I rarely use the word "lush" to describe a song. Actually, I don't think I have ever used the word "lush" to describe a song. But "Vessels" is lush. And beautiful. And I can't stop listening to it. Bonus recommendation: In the new issue of Esquire, they recommend five somewhat obscure songs that you probably didn't hear this year, though you should have. I downloaded a couple of them last night, and one is particularly awesome. It's called "Grounds For Divorce" by Elbow. Check it out.